Zombie Jesus Day

April 12, 2009 at 8:18 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | 20 Comments

What a silly thing to celebrate, Easter, I mean Zombie Jesus Day. The above picture describes it better that I could. If you cut out the miracles, the rising from the dead and walking around like a zombie, the story of Jesus is a pretty good story. Not original, but good. How people can be gullible enough to believe that Jesus came back after he died I will never know.

I had a weird experience today, Zombie Jesus Day. I recently started a new job doing collections in a call center. I call people who are past due on their car payment. It’s actually fun job at times, because the people get upset at me, but it’s not my fault they didn’t pay on time. I always work on Sundays and that’s okay. Often people will tell me that I shouldn’t call on the lord’s day. My response is always something like, “If you had made your payment on time, I wouldn’t have to call you.”

Today being the silly holy day it is, I knew people were going to cuss me out for calling them while they were worshiping their zombie. I did get cussed out a few times by these “good christian people.” (I used that term because I can’t stand it when people say that, as if good people are always christian.) I don’t think that Jesus would approve of their language. One man went on for the longest time about how he was sorry for me because I was working on Easter. I had to convince him I was okay with working on Easter to get him off the phone.

Most of the time at the beginning of the call they would say, “It’s Easter Sunday, why are you calling me?” Each time I said, “Well if you would have made your payment by the due date or before today, I wouldn’t have called.” Why did they always say Easter Sunday? It’s never Easter Tuesday, it’s always on Sunday.

Well to finish the day off right I must watch a zombie movie. I love horror movies and what a good reason to watch one. I have one I have never seen before called Zombie Island Massacre. It looks kinda stupid, but who cares, ITS ZOMBIES!

Here is an interesting page about zombie Jesus:
http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Zombie_Jesus

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20 Comments »

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  1. not kool dude. seriously. not kool.

    • Im jewish, jesus is a traitor, fuck him!

    • im not religious at all but that is your opinion in short form what if its true what if its not people have there beliefs who cares what you think it just shows the lack of disrespect humans have for each other and there bullshit baggage. and if people have hard times paying there bill on time calling them during the week is ok calling them on weekends well it is obvious you dont have a life and people probly dont want to be around your bullshit frustration on relgion,

  2. bequiet, y the hell r u talking shit about christianity! u have no buisness comenting like tht

    • Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.

      • You rock man 😉

  3. That’s….. offensive

    • Your first error is the lack of understanding whom Jesus was “Before) his fleshly birth! He’s in the Old Testament as The Voice of The Lord, The Word of The Lord, The Angel of The Lord, and the Son of Man, that was with the three Hebrew in the furnace of fire.

      Genesis 18:1-3 (KJV) – 1 And the “LORD” appeared unto him (Abraham) in the plains of Mamre: and he sat in the tent door in the heat of the day;
      2 And he lift up his eyes and looked, and, lo, three men stood by him: and when he saw them, he ran to meet them from the tent door, and bowed himself toward the ground,
      3 And said, My Lord, if now I have found favour in thy sight, pass not away, I pray thee, from thy servant:

      Read the rest of the chapter if you want see more! But, maybe that’s it…you don’t want to believe!

  4. Amen Brother. The only reason anyone is bitching about your rant is because it is about Jesus. Any other zombie and the story would be different, but because it’s Jesus everyone is having a fit.

    For all the religious tools out there, The hardest thing about being an Athiest is that when I die I can’t say I told you so.

    • You’ll say something, but it won’t be ‘I told you so.’

  5. Fuck Jesus!!

  6. Awesome!

  7. Really? Even if he wasn’t the son of (a) god he still gave his life for everyone? Isn’t that enough? Or Since It Does Not Benefit You Directly you have to make fun of him?

    It’s Funny How Atheists Mock Us For Basing Your Lives OfF A “Book” But Do They Not Do The Same Thing? No Matter How Long You Look, Or How Hard You Try To Deny It, If You Believe In Science You Are No Different Than US.

    Science States That Chance Created Us.
    Religion States That God Created Us.

    Notice Anything? It’s The Same Damn Sentence With 2 Words Changed!!
    Guess what? Chance IS Your GOD

  8. Non-payment of your fiduciary obligations makes Baby Zombie Jeebus cry.

    • From Psalm 37:21

      “The wicked borrows but does not pay back, but the righteous is generous and gives”

      So much for “good Christian people”, huh?

  9. Is this hating on Christianity thing because we gained your independence for you whimps and you guys are too ugly to get laid? I’m a Christian, that’s pretty funny and original. Don’t hate, go masturbate. Let’s call it what it is. I hate Americans because I’m fat. Now go to the gym or a strip club or college; But stop the crying for Zombie’s sake. Cry baby! Cry baby! Hahahahahahahahahhahaha.

  10. God hath delivered us from the power of darkness, and hath translated us into the kingdom of His dear Son: In whom we have redemption through His blood even the forgiveness of sins. Who is the image of the invisible God the first born of every creature: For by Him were all things created that are in heaven and that are in earth, visible and invisible, whether they be thrones or dominions or principalities or powers: all things were created by Him and for Him. And He is before all things, and by Him all things consist.

    • And… they will either get it, or they won’t. But even Michael didn’t condemn the devils who tried to steal Moses’ body. ‘Adonai condemn you.’ We condemn ourselves by having the truth all around us, yet refusing to listen–and that is what defines modern-day atheists. They are not educated enough to even listen to the other side. May we all come into the Light.

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